How
to Keep Friends
Keeping your
old friends is as important as finding new ones. Unlike your relatives whom you
keep due to inheritance, maintaining your friends requires effort. Even a
strong friendship will not withstand prolonged neglect. Read on to learn how to
keep friends.
Instructions
o 1 Make a conscious decision about which of your friends are transient and
whom you want to keep for life. Transient friendships will move with their own
momentum but ones that are lifelong will require work at times.
o 2 Bind yourself to your lifelong friends by means of a mental commitment.
According to this commitment you must be willing to make the friendship
overcome all obstacles that do not have a malicious intent. If you can't bring
yourself to do this then the friendship is not strong. You are not obliged to
continue a friendship if a severe violation has occurred originating from a
malicious motivation.
o 3 Call your friends once a month, at the very minimum, to show concern.
Buy them gifts on major holidays and anniversaries to exhibit appreciation.
Finding time for your friends should never be a problem.
o 4 Display understanding, non-judgmental behavior and an interest that you
desire what is best for your old friends. Celebrate their successes, and offer
empathy and good counsel during their hardships. Fault finding is a major
irritant and should be avoided.
o 5 Participate in fun activities with your friends. Going out to an
occasional movie, date hunt or sports activity can give a friendship that
suffers from too much intimacy, vitality and lightness.
o 6 Be willing to step out of your comfort zone to help a friend in need.
When there is a conflict between your ego and your old friends, choose your
friends.
Tips & Warnings
·
Events not
having a malicious intent that can end a transient friendship but not one that
is lifelong include marriage, relocation, conflict due to felt attraction for
the same third party, boredom, an occasional outburst of temper, temporary
neglect due to a busy schedule and even shift of interests.
·
Events that can
destroy lifelong friendships include, severe dishonesty, betrayal and other
types of behavior having malicious intent.
·
There are
controversial occurrences that may or may not compromise a true friendship,
depending on their severity and the attitude of the friends involved. Some
examples are, habitually lowering the other's self-esteem by put downs, making
a sexual advance and one-sided borrowing or lending
source- www.ehow.com
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